I won’t ask you…

Frida Kahlo told her husband, “I’m not asking you to kiss me, nor apologize to me when I think you’re wrong. I won’t even ask you to hug me when I need it most. I don’t ask you to tell me how beautiful I am, even if it’s a lie, nor write me anything beautiful. I won’t even ask you to call me to tell me how your day went, nor tell me you miss me. I won’t ask you to thank me for everything I do for you, nor to care about me when my soul is down, and of course, I won’t ask you to support me in my decisions. I won’t even ask you to listen to me when I have a thousand stories to tell you. I won’t ask you to do anything, not even be by my side forever. Because if I have to ask you, I don’t want it anymore.” #depth #warriorwoman

This so speaks to me as an unloved daughter. I have not always made good choices in romantic partners. Most men have never said anything like this unless I begged. A romantic relationship, for me, is rarely a place to get my emotional needs met. I have come to an understanding of this fact. It no longer triggers negitive emotions. I am enough, I am beautiful, I have people I tell my stories to and I am confident in my decisions.

Not demanding, asking, begging for your emotional needs gives a freedom to romance; nothing expected or needed. Live each moment to the fullest with no demands. Enjoy each other. Enjoy life. For a woman raised in chaos, searching desperately for any approval as a child, a no demands, no needs relationship is good enough. Even joyful. Once I have to beg, I don’t want it.